Friday, June 10, 2011

inner peace


Inner peace...
What does that mean? and how can one achieve it?
Does anyone have inner peace? how does it feel??

I dont know, there are different answers out there different methods of trying to achieve that feeling...but....i don't know.

We are all living in this life...in this world...we do seem different with our personalties, backgrounds and even philosophy of life, some have it deep others just "want to live, but never the less we are all missing one thing!

Inner peace.
Who has it??

When we were younger we used to view the world in such innocents, such purity and such beauty. We loved every moment, enjoyed the smallest thing that comes towards us. Laughing from the depth of our hearts and dancing around with the wind in any way it blew us.

Grown ups used to look at us and say "Oh you poor thing, your so innocent...tomorrow you'll grow and see the truth of this world!" we hear them but we never understand what they mean and just keep going.

Then tomorrow comes, it start with an innocent act from us that is thrown back to our face after it has been "hit, squashed and spit on"!. Shocked and confused not knowing why, but we try again. And again, same reactions, our innocents start fading away and the words "...you will see the TRUTH of this world!" echos in our minds.

Our view of the world changes, we become more disturbed more confused more frustrated. Either trying so hard to make sense of it (which we wont and will end up in isolation of the world) or build a dark and angry view of the world...and live miserably.

In all cases...we are miserable...and peace? we don't even know of such a word!?

Trust, love and passion? what are you talking about?!! Your best friend since Kg has been spreading rummers about you and that dream that you had of becoming a famous and artistic painter...well...all you got is people laughing at you saying how can you live putting paint on paper..you think thats creativity?? and now your in a small office photocopying papers.

Even that dancing with the wind that you always enjoyed, you don't do anymore. Either than the fact that people think your crazy doing that, but now this wind is not pure, its full of toxics and dirt...that will kill you!

oh so confused so lost...so frustrated....augh...whats the point of this life? We are in this life to "die" right? to "suffer"? ..... to what???

ok STOP THINKING...big breath...close your eyes and repeat after me....
"la elha el Allah"

Don't think...just repeat...

Life is not perfect that is a giving...and its not easy as well...
but don't you think that we are the ones who make it harder then it is really??

Remember that wind dancing that you used to do...just loved to let go and let the wind just move you around...and the wind that is to toxic now...you know...its the same wind! It never changed...its the same wind...just your view changed...

No one ever told you that the wind is clean and pure, you just enjoyed what it gave with what ever it had...and you know...no harm from the wind happened to you...did it?

And remember when you used to laugh so hard that you cant breath, even though there wasn't anything that was really funny!? We used to laugh at the simplest things, just because we enjoy laughing.

And that dream that you had of being an artist, go look at your old paintings that you used to paint when you were younger and pretending that you were a famous painter, then look at the very few paintings that you did now, after what those people told you, do you see it? What made you change? Words that people said and you believed!?
What if you didn't listen to them and continued with that same love that you had...close your eyes...imagine...now....
how do you feel?


ok, yes life is full of disappointments...and lots of difficulties and "pain". But life is life...it never changed...its the same life that we had when we were younger. Yes maybe we have a little bit more responsibilities than we used to, but we faced worries as we are now. One of our biggest worries now (for example) is surviving the day without being fired from our job, and when we were younger we had the same worry but it was more of not letting the monsters under our bed get us at night.

It might sound silly to us now, but back then it was as "worrisome" as being fired by our boss today.
But why didn't we grow gray hairs and have anxiety attacks as we do now?

Remember when its time for bed, and the lights are closed and your holding your teddy so tightly keeping your eyes shut trying to sleep but you cant...you hear voices, you feel things are moving under your bed...your afraid to look down or the monster will snatch you away...you cry! Then your mum comes rushing to your side "Whats wrong my sweetie?", so nervously you try to explain, about these voices about whats going on. She smiles to you gives you a gentle kiss on your forehead and says in a soft but strong voice "Don't worry but sweetheart, i am right here beside you, nothing bad will get you".
Still rapped around her arms, a bit scared..but slowly your fear despairs, and you enter this calm and safe feeling..and then your fast a sleep. Did the monsters disappear? you don't know, Why are there monsters? you don't know, but also don't really care anymore...because you are safe!

When we were young, we had fears, we worried a lot, we did bump our heads sometimes and bleed...we did cry but we never "lost it", because always our parents were there, looking at us, comforting our pain and encouraging us to keep going.
And we knew that, and we loved that and moved in peace even though we had fears and pains.

Now we are older, moving along this world, still loving our parents, but they cant do anything about our boss or our bills.
Facing one problem to another, feeling down and seeing the world in darkness...so lost so confused...anxiety!

What happened? why don't we have that same peace that we had before?
We took matters into our own hands thats what happened...
When we were younger we moved, we played, we learned...but knowing that our parents are there telling us "its ok" protecting us, we moved farther and farther...

and now when we are older...we grew our problems grew with us....but who do we turn to?
our parents? our friends? our selves?? or planes???
All these things we don't really trust, they are changeable and they have surprised us and hurt us...
and thus our problems increased...our fear increased...and those monsters under our bed are climbing up to get us!!!

"Mummy!!!?" who should we call now? where should we turn?

life is life it never changed...but we just forgot who we should turn to....we forgot how to TRUST, no matter what happens!!!!

(image from http://duffelup.tumblr.com/)

3 comments:

Huda said...

Assalamalikum Fadoush,

Lovely post jazak Allah khayr.So basically, we must turn to Allah SWT instead of relying on people.I have learnt this the hard way and believe me I'm learning this more and more as I move on with life.Hasbiallahu laailaaaha illah allah.And I truly believe that Allah SWT puts us through the worst days so we learn and practice tawakkul.Jazak Allah khayr :)

Huda said...

Oh by the way I go by the nickname Huda on the web ;) You know who this is sah ?

Fida said...

w eyaki =) hm actully im not sure who this is (shy face) lol but let me knw plz =))